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Shit My Dad Says
- shitmydadsays: "I lost 20 pounds...How? I drank bear piss and took up fencing. How the fuck you think, son? I exercised." 2010/03/06
- shitmydadsays: "Science and Mother Nature are in a marriage where Science is always surprised to come home and find Mother Nature blowing the neighbor." 2010/02/28
- shitmydadsays: "A parent's only as good as their dumbest kid. If one wins a Nobel Prize but the other gets robbed by a hooker, you failed." 2010/02/22
- shitmydadsays: "There's a word for people like that...No, I'm saying, there's a word and I don't know what it is. I'm not being fucking poetic." 2010/02/18
- shitmydadsays: "Nah, we don't celebrate it. Don't know who St. Valentine was, don't give a shit, and doubt he wants people screwing in his memory." 2010/02/14
- shitmydadsays: "I don't get it; I sweat, I smell fine. You sweat, you smell like mule shit...Relax, she's on the treadmill next to you, she knows." 2010/02/09
- shitmydadsays: "Don't mess with him...Trust me, you don't fuck with a man that sleeps next to a woman he never screws. They're unpredictable." 2010/02/05